Attraction can be frustrating. You struggle to bring into your life your desires, and nothing much happens. Your days are filled with deprivation, not abundance. You lack love. You go without friendship. You miss intimacy. You wallow in debt. You put in hard labor that goes unappreciated.
The list of what you don’t have and don’t want seems endless. So how do you turn this around? Do you rail at “the system”? Do you blame nameless “elites” and believe yourself a victim of forces beyond your control?
Since you are reading this book, you already at least suspect that you play a central role in creating the reality you live every day. You are fairly sure it’s up to you to attract an abundant life filled with love, friendship, financial security, and whatever else you desire.
But here’s the rub. You are not certain of how to go about attracting/manifesting all of the aforesaid. You want to understand the mechanics behind attraction and, especially, what blocks or hampers the process. You want to remove or at least lessen those obstacles, but don’t know what they are or how to find them. That is what this chapter discusses.
Redefining energy and consciousness
The ability to attract arises out of consciousness. Consciousness is a field of energy that surrounds your physical body, which is also energy in a material form. This energy field is your essence, and exists regardless of whether or not it is attached to a physical body. This energy field imbues you with self-awareness, personality, thoughts, feelings, and beliefs, and connects you to Source/God/Goddess/Universal Mind/All That Is. (Pick your preferred label.) Some people refer to consciousness as the soul.
Soul-consciousness is a unique energy, however. It is not energy as defined by science. The scientific definition of energy is the ability to do work. The heat from burning coal transforms water to steam to drive a piston that pushes a locomotive down a track. That is the ability to do work. Science provides a material understanding of energy that is too limited to explain attraction.
A more useful, spiritual definition of energy defines it as the ability to love. Defining and understanding energy this way immediately shows how it relates to the divine, to soul-consciousness, and to attraction. Love, after all, is attractive and attracting. People yearn for love. They are drawn to it and want to attract it into their lives.
And the divine/God/Goddess are words that describe the ability to love unconditionally, meaning without any limits of any kind. Unconditional love is the most powerful, most expansive, most all-encompassing love possible yet also the gentlest. It makes no demands, sets no standards, imposes no expectations, which is why it is unlimited. Few people do not long to feel loved unconditionally.
Your soul-consciousness expresses your unique ability to love. Your ability to love, and the ability of everyone on earth, is limited, meaning your and their love has conditions, standards, and expectations attached to it. These limitations on love are precisely what hamstrings your and others’ ability to attract. More about that shortly, since it is the heart of this chapter.
Soul-consciousness has other characteristics that are involved in attraction. It is both electric and magnetic. It is male/masculine and female/feminine. Male is electric, a push energy. Female is magnetic, a pull energy. Male is logical/active/doing. Female is emotional/receptive/being.
In this world, male/electric/doing energy has far more credibility than female/magnetic/pull energy, which is often ignored or inaccurately maligned as seduction. Yet attraction is impossible without magnetic energy. This means attraction is 99 percent about your being, not your doing. Attraction arises out of your attitudes, beliefs, feelings, and thoughts, not your actions.
This is a critical point. Many people are taught that to attract, there must be an equal balance between attitudes, thoughts, feelings, beliefs (being) and actions, methods, techniques, and implementation (doing). This is a myth! The state of your being determines your ultimate ability to attract, along with other factors to be reviewed later that affect the state of your being.
Think of it this way. You are already attracting, without lifting a finger. You may be drawing what you don’t want into your life, or something that is merely okay, but you are attracting. And it’s not a result of any action you take or technique you try. You attract automatically out of your soul-consciousness, your being.
In one way, that’s a relief. You already know you can attract because you are already attracting. Here is what you now need to grasp. The attracting part of your being is the magnetic/feminine part—the very part of self that people tend to ignore or even distrust.
Back up a bit. The whole self consists of four parts, not two or three. People tend to define the self as body-mind or body-mind-spirit. The entire self, however, consists of body, mind, spirit, and heart. Another way of saying this is cellular mind (physical body), conscious mind (mental body), unconscious mind (spiritual body), and subconscious mind (emotional body).
That latter part of part self, the subconscious or emotional body, is the part that people tend to dismiss or call foolish. After all, when imagined or visualized, the emotional body pops usually up as a needy, sniveling inner child that cries and whines. That inner child is in a world of pain, not to mention a one-down position compared with the grown-up rest of self. For that reason, most people do their best to ignore or even deny it. And, to no surprise, most spiritual traditions teach about controlling or abjuring emotions altogether in favor of the “higher” mental planes.
But if you want to attract your desires, you cannot ignore or negate the magnetic emotional body, the attracting part of self. This part of self is absolutely vital to your well-being. It feels your own heart’s innermost desires for you. When you ignore or deny your emotional body, you invariably live in a manner that is not authentic to your true nature and innermost longings. You attract something other than what you want at the deepest level of your being.
Small wonder attraction seems indefinable and mysterious. First, people are trying to attract using the electric part of their soul-consciousness, but that is a push energy that repels what they want, not draws it to them. Second, and most important, the attracting part of their being is wounded and not as powerful as it could be, so it cannot attract to the fullest extent of its true capability.
Soul-consciousness and self-judgment
How did the magnetic emotional body/inner child become so hamstrung and feel so powerless? Can you do anything about it?
The good news is yes, you can. You can grow up that inner child to a childlike adult still enchanted with rainbows and butterflies and still full of wonder at the world. You can heal that wounded part of self so that it becomes a more powerful magnetic attractor and starts drawing to you more of what you want and less of what you don’t want.
There’s a reason the emotional body appears and feels like a child instead of an adult. Think back to judgment. Judgment—specifically, judgment against self—becomes stuck in the magnetic energy of the emotional body, and prevents it from growing up even while the physical, mental, and spiritual parts of self mature.
Self-judgment also injures all of your soul-consciousness and depletes it of the power it needs to attract. Every time you judge against self, you fracture your soul-consciousness and hand over a piece of it to the person or institution involved in establishing that self-judgment. You don’t mean to judge yourself, but when people or events overwhelm the limits of your understanding and resilience, judging against self is how you try to make sense of your experience(s) and put some distance between you and the pain.
The irony, of course, is that judging against yourself only disempowers you and causes more pain in the long run. Everyone has judged against self repeatedly over multiple lifetimes, and you carry in your soul-consciousness thousands of self-judgments, all stuck in the magnetic emotional body.
Here is just one small example of how you might make a self-judgment, drawn from a real-life case history. You are a two-year-old girl who has beautiful blond curls that garner a lot of praise and attention from grown-ups. You assume that your beauty and worth reside in your hair. Then you contract a disease with a high fever, and your mother, wanting to ease your suffering, shaves your hair to help you cool down.
Your two-year-old self, not understanding, judges that you are no longer beautiful because your hair is gone, and that your mother is your enemy because she robbed you of your beauty. You spend decades feeling ugly, dressing plainly, and estranged from your mother without ever understanding consciously how or why, until you finally recall and release these self-judgments and assumptions and forgive yourself and your mother.
Just why is self-judgment so toxic to soul-consciousness, robbing it of power and sapping its ability to attract? The answer is clear in how another characteristic of soul-consciousness contrasts so sharply with judgment. Soul-consciousness vibrates. Everything that exists in the universe vibrates to a distinct frequency, from the infinite divine to the tiniest wave-particle.
Your soul-consciousness has a unique frequency and that is how others recognize you even if they have not met you previously in this lifetime. At the unconscious level, they recognize your unique vibrational frequency.
Judgment against self, however, does not vibrate. It fixes your emotional reality so that it is stagnant and unchanging. What happens to a body of water that does not move? It becomes brackish and foul. The same holds for soul-consciousness. In that area of soul-consciousness related to the particular self-judgment, its vibration slows or stops altogether. That negatively impacts the entire energy field of soul-consciousness. Recall how that two-year-old felt about herself and her mother after she judged against herself.
One final note. You cannot perceive your self-judgments using the conscious mind (mental body), or even visualize self-judgment with the intuitive (psychic) senses of the spiritual body. Lurking in the subconscious, self-judgment flies under your attention radar and lies to you about what it is and its profoundly harmful impact on you at all levels, and on your ability to attract.
This is a sample taken from a chapter in the book Believe and Succeed: The Law of Attraction Uncovered. The chapter is written by Candace L. Talmadge.